as gloomy as i'm feeling... no, it doesn't have to do with my son. we are ok. we may have some heated discussions (read: arguments) at times, but we're always good. we always find a way to resolve our issues, his issues.
i hate it when i am treated like i'm someone insignificant, and spoken to like there's nothing between my ears. i don't know what is with him - whether he's going through male menopause or something... he blows hot and cold. i've been very patient, just trying to ignore when he's in "that"mood, and speaks to me in "that" tone of voice that makes me feel like i'm stupid. then you just reach that point when it will just get to you, like it finally got to me now.
i specially hate it when i know i didn't do or even say anything that would deserve such a treatment, and so when it did happen the last time, i just had it. i didn't talk to him about it. i didn't tell him anything. i just stopped talking unless it is necessary. i guess he noticed since he has been speaking to me in a gentler, kinder voice. but i cannot just bring myself to just go back to my old, chatty self. i only speak when spoken to. i now seldom give any comment or opinion to anything, whether it's the news or whatever it is we're watching, which is just not like me. at all.
earlier this evening, he tinkered with the bathtub's drain, and got out clumps of hair - my hair - that was causing the slow drain. i said something about the wire he used. he got irritated, i got irritated so i'm sure he will be back to his old grumpy self again, and either stop talking to me altogether or talk to me "that" way again, and give me the freezing cold treatment.
i'd like to say i couldn't care less, but in reality, i just want to bawl, and let all my frustrations out. it hurts so bad. i hate it. i hate this. i hate, hate, hate, hate, hate all these!!!
and now i am so mad...
